Next few years
Next few years
The second time Narendranath went to Dakshineswar, a month later. Sri Ramakrishna was alone, sitting on his bedstead. As soon as he saw Narendranath, he received him cordially and asked him to sit near himself on the bed. In a moment, overcome with emotion, the Master drew closer to him. Muttering something to him, and with eyes fixed on the young aspirant, he touched him with his right his foot. The magic touch produced a strange experience in Narendranath. With his eyes open, he saw the walls and everything in the room, nay, the whole universe and himself within it, whirling and vanishing into an all encompassing void. He was frightened as he thought he might be on the verge of death; and cried out: What are you doing to me? I have my parents at home. Sri Ramakrishna laughed aloud at this, and stroking Narendranath chest said: All right, let us leave it there for the present. Everything will come in time. Surprisingly, as soon as he uttered these words, Narendranath became his old self again. Sri Ramakrishna, too, was quite normal in his behaviour towards him after the incident, and treated him kindly and with great affection. Drawn by this kindness and, even more, by the need to fathom the mystery, Narendranath went to Dakshineswar for a third time, probably a week later. He was determined not to allow the previous experience to repeat itself, and was fully on his guard. But with all his critical faculties alert, he fared no better. Sri Ramakrishna took him to the adjacent garden belonging to Jadunath Mallik. After a stroll, they sat down in the parlour. Soon, Sri Ramakrishna fell into a spiritual trance and touched Narendranath. Despite his precautions Narendranath was totally over whelmed adn he lost all outward consciousness. When he regained consciousness, he found Sri Ramakrishna stroking his chest.
Referring to his incident, Sri Ramakrishna said later on: I put several questions to him while he was in that state. I asked him about his antecedents, and where he lived, his mission in this world and the duration of his mortal life. He gave fitting answers after diving deep into himself. The answers only confirmed what I had seen and inferred about him, These things shall remain a secret, but I came to know that he was a sage who had attained perfection, a past master in meditation, and the day he know his real nature, he will give up the body by an act of will, through Yoga.Of all the disciples of Sri Ramakrishna, Narendranath alone doubted the Master and critised any of his teachings that appeared irrational. Firmly poised as he was in the knowledge of the highest truth, Sri Ramakrishna, however, did not upset the intellectual outbursts of Narendranath. He rose equal to the occasion. He never asked Narendranath to abandon his reason. On the other hand, he enjoyed his criticisms, and even encouraged them. He told him: Test me as the money changers test their coins. You must not accept me until you have tested me thoroughly. Narendranath was bitterly against the doctrine of Advaita Vedanta which Sri Ramakrishna was eager to explain to him. The Advaita idea of the identity of the individual soul and the Supreme Self appeared to him as bizarre and blasphemous. Sri Ramakrishna tried his best to bring home to the disciple the truth of Advaita by reason and argument, but without success. One day after a trying discussion, he found Narendranath speaking about the doctrine disparagingly to a friend and in a light vein. Sri Ramakrishna, in a semi conscious mood, approached him and just touched him, and immediately a wonderful change came over Narendranath. He was filled with the consciousness that everything around him was God. The impression persisted even when he reached home, at the end of the day. He did not relish his food. He ate too much or too little, to the consternation of his mother. He felt that the food, the materials, the server and he himself were all God. In the street, he did not feel like moving out of way of the swiftly, moving cabs, thinking they were God Himself. In the public park, he struck his head against the railing to see if they were real. This feeling lasted for many days. Henceforth he could not deny the truth of Advaita.In 1884, Vishwanath Datta (Narendranaths father) suddenly passed away, plunging the whole family into grief and poverty. He was the only earning member of the family, and being of a prodigal nature, he spent lavishly and left the family in debt.
Everywhere the door was slammed in his (Vivekanandas) face. Friends turned into enemies in an instant. Creditors began knocking at the door. Temptations came. Two rich women made proposals to him to end his poverty, and he turned them down with scorn. Often he went without food so that others at home might have a better share. He was face to face with realities and the world appeared to him to be the creation of a devil. Nevertheless, the prot