tips to successful relationship

In actuality, what ruins relationships is not resolving your fights, Blum said. Fights can be really healthy, and an important form of communication and clearing the air.
Also, the type of fight a couple has plays a role. Not surprisingly, nasty, scornful or condescending fights that leave couples resolution less and not talking for days damage the relationship. Productive conflicts that help the relationship end with some mutual decision about how to manage this disagreement, Blum said. Here s help on improving your communication and becoming a better listen and speaker.

Relationships are about not only taking, but also giving. If you find yourself not giving very much, or feeling resentful of how much you give and how little you receive back, you may be in an unequal relationship where one side is taking more than they are giving.
For instance, couples sometimes mistakenly believe that love will help them deal with any issue that comes up, and that if the other person truly loved you, they would just do as you ask. But people are independent with their own unique needs and personalities. Just because we found someone we want to spend our lives with doesnt mean we give up our own identity in the process.

Relationships live and die not by the sword, but by the amount of discussion. If two people cant find a way to openly and honestly communicate their needs and feelings to one another, the relationship doesnt stand much of a chance long term. Couples must find a way to communicate regularly, openly, and directly.
This doesnt mean waiting for an argument to tell your significant other how much he bothers you with his throwing his clothes on the floor instead of the hamper. It means telling him when you feel the need to, and to do so in a manner that is respectful but assertive.

After marriage or when two people move in together, couples tend to discover pretty much the same thing no matter who they are that they are two different people and living together is harder than anyone ever told them. Love conquers a lot of things, but it is no match for living day in and day out with another human being especially if youve spent years on your own .
Prepare yourself for this challenge by choosing what arguments you want to turn into a full blown battle. For instance, do you really want to start a fight over the toothpaste cap or how clean the shower is? Or would you rather reserve your energy for the discussions over finances, kids, and career paths you know, the things that might really matter to a person . Too many couples fight and bicker over the dumbest things, especially when put into context of issues of true importance.

Sometimes when we enter into a long term relationship, we put ourselves second, behind the other persons needs and desires. We might give up working to have a child, or agree to move to another city to help support our significant others career. And thats fine, but you need to be realistic first with yourself about whether such things really matter to you or not. If they do, you need to find a way to communicate such needs with your partner, and compromise where possible.

Different people have different areas of concern, but almost everyone values trust and honesty from their partner above all. Why? Because your partner is the one person you want to be able to depend upon in the long term, without question or doubt.
Little things where your significant other hasnt been completely honest shouldnt be blown out of proportion, because virtually everybody tells little white lies especially when one is dating . Focus instead on the big things, like if they say theyre a lawyer and you discover theyve never even passed the bar, or they say they like kids but later on insist on never having one.

Attain this through quality time spent with your significant other. Be an active listener and pay close attention to their behavior. Try to be sensitive to their emotions and moods as they fluctuate.

An equal partnership shares the load and has two people in roles of accountability for the sake of the greater good. Strive to help each other bear the burdens of everyday life through discussion of what your needs are.

This is the key to any successful relationship when it is built on a foundation of mutual trust, honesty and respect. Encourage your partner to be open with you and demonstrate how supportive you can be. Praise and compliment your mate on a regular basis and show your affection. Never take your significant other for granted.

Remember that most major decisions in a relationship come under the domain of two individuals and as such, deserve the consideration of both people. Avoid that selfish gut instinct, and empower and involve your partner in crucial decisions.