tips to succeed in love

Tips to succeed in Love

There is an art and science to building strong relationships.
21. Partner heal thyself
Dont expect your partner to fill your emotional holes, and dont try to fill theirs. Ultimately, each of us can only heal ourselves. Your partner, however, can be supportive as you work with yourself, and vice versa. In fact, living in a loving relationship is healing in and of itself.
22. Relish the differences between you
The differences between you and your partner are not negatives. You dont need to be with someone who shares all of your interests and views. We may sometimes fear that these differences are incompatibilities, but in fact, theyre often what keeps a relationship exciting and full of good fire.
23. Ask questions
All too often, we make up our own stories or interpretations about what our partners behavior means. For example She doesnt want to cuddle; she must not really love me anymore. We can never err on the side of asking too many questions, and then listen to the answers from your whole self heart, gut, mind and body. Equally important is to hear whats not being said the facts and feeling that you sense might be unspoken.
24. Make time for your relationship
No matter who you are or what your work is, you need to nurture your relationship. Make sure you schedule time for the well being of your relationship. That includes making playdates and also taking downtime together. Frequently create a sacred space together by shutting off all things technological and digital. Like a garden, the more you tend to your relationship, the more it will grow.
25. Say the hard things from love
Become aware of the hard things that youre not talking about. How does that feel? No matter what youre feeling in a situation, channel the energy of your emotions so that you say what you need to say in a constructive manner.
26. Connect with the different parts of yourself
Each of us is not a solo instrument. Were more like a choir or an orchestra with several voices. What is your mind saying? What is your heart saying? What is your body saying? What is your gut saying? For example My mind is saying
27. Improve your social skills
According to research conducted by University of California Santa Barbara economist Catherine Weinberger, the most successful business people excel in both cognitive ability and social skills, something that hasnt always been true. She crunched data linking adolescent skills in 1972 and 1992 with adult outcomes, and found that in 1980, having both skills didnt correlate with better success, whereas today the combination does. The people who are both smart and socially adept earn more in todays work force than similarly endowed workers in 1980, she says.
28. Talk to each other
just because you love each other doesnt mean you will be able to communicate well or can read your partners mind, or that they can read yours. Communicate your needs dont wait for your partner to try to guess what is going on with you. If you have something to bring up, do it gently going on the attack rarely gets you what you want.
29. Listen to each other
Often we are so busy defending ourselves that we dont hear what our partner is saying. Let your partner know that you have heard them before you give them your response.
30. Make repair attempts
If your attempts to talk about an issue dont go as planned, try not to let the situation become even more negative such as not talking for extended periods or ignoring the other persons attempts. Saying sorry or touching your partner in a caring manner shows you care, even though you disagree.