Myth about Adoption

1. All children are curious about where they came from For those who do not have facts, you will explore possible scenarios with your child You will also discuss why adoptions from that country occurred at that time As for the fears of contact with birth families, the reality is that contact can be anything from a phone conversation somewhere along the adoption process, to ongoing contact during and after the adoption takes place Having contact .....

Adoption is very expensive

2. The costs of adoption vary depending on the type of process and allowable state and federal expenses Costs may include legal or agency fees, the baby and birth mother s medical costs, the birth family s living expenses, travel expenses, advertising and networking fees, federal application fees, homestudy and post adoption report fees Some families choose a process or to remain close to home to reduce travel costs You should always get a detail .....

I can get all the information I need on the Internet

3. There is a lot of information on the Internet, the adoption process needs to be tailored to your particular family Remember, it is hard to know who is posting information in cyberspace Adoption professionals recommend you double check any information with a local source In addition to finding out the most current information, you also need to make sure you meet state and federal regulations regarding adoption There are many sites and e lists .....

Only married couples with a stay at home parent can adopt children from foster care

4. A person s marital status, age, income, or sexual orientation do not automatically disqualify them from eligibility to adopt You don t need to own your own home, have children already, be young, wealthy, or a stay at home parent In 2011, 32 percent of children adopted from foster care were matched with either a single parent household or unmarried couple This includes adoptions by lesbian, gay, bisexual, and transgender (LGBT) families Find ou .....

Each child has to have a room of their own

5. Each child needs a bed of their own, not a room of their own In addition, children of the opposite fun may share a room if they are under an age specified by the State (usually around 6 years old) In some instances, however, there may be child to square feet requirements or behavioral concerns that will prevent children from being able to share a room Find out more about being an adoptive parent and being a foster parent .....

Sibling relationships don t matter

6. Placing siblings together is almost always the best thing for them after being separated from their birth parents It helps provide continuity and protects them from suffering additional loss Currently 25 percent of children photolisted on AdoptUSKids are siblings who need to be placed together .....

The Hope of Being Adopted

7. You don t have to be perfect to be a perfect parent There are thousands of children in foster care who would be happy to be part of your family To a foster care child, waiting to be adopted can feel like waiting for a miracle You could be that miracle Watch the video the right to hear from children in their own words talk about the hope of being adopted .....

A birth parent or another relative can take an adopted child back

8. Adoptions of children from U S foster care are legally binding agreements that do not occur until the rights of all parents have been legally terminated by a court of law It s very rare that an adoption is challenged in court by a child s birth relative More than 98 percent of legally completed adoptions remain intact Find out more about legalizing an adoption As far as child in foster care having continued contact with their birth family, it .....

Can I continue with any fertility treatments whilst I apply to adopt

9. If you have been undergoing treatment to conceive, we will usually ask that at least six months have elapsed since the last cycle of treatment has finished This request will depend on how long you were in treatment and may vary case by case We know from experience and research that this period after treatment allows for the one chapter to end and another begin It is best that adoption is a positive choice rather than a reactive one to infert .....

Do I need experience of looking after children

10. if you want to adopt, particularly if you are thinking of older children or sibling groups Some of our applicants undertake voluntary work in a nursery, school or club to gain experience with children they do not know, as this can be helpful Clearly any personal or professional .....

Can I adopt if I smoke

11. No PACT is aware of the medical evidence regarding the impact of passive smoking on children and is looking to place children in smoke free homes Local authorities placing children will not prioritise a family where anyone smokes, whether in the home or not If you currently smoke and would like to adopt via PACT you will have to give up smoking (cigarettes and cigars) You will need confirmation from your GP that you have started a Smoking Ces .....

People adopt to save a child

12. Adoption should be chosen because someone wishes to be a parent and provide a child with a family Parenthood is a lifetime commitment whether a child is born into a family or adopted into a family Children do not want saviors; they want parents who will love and nourish them as their children .....

Adoption is a more traumatic experience for a woman than abortion

13. With an abortion, the pain of deep regret may continue for a lifetime Adoption, when understood correctly, is initially painful but is then followed by a lifetime of satisfaction for having planned a wonderful life for the child .....

Adoption is an irresponsible act and women who choose adoption take the easy way out

14. Adoption is a responsible decision made by a person mature enough to place the best interests of her baby ahead of her immediate emotions .....

Adopted children grow up feeling bitter and rejected

15. The child will grow up knowing that his family was created by adoption and understanding that his or her birth mother selflessly planned a wonderful future for her child The child will be grateful for the birth parents choice of adoption .....

The adoption process is secretive

16. : Birth mothers at AAI can select and meet with the adoptive family, having the opportunity to personally ask and receive information directly from them, as well as provide information for them to share with their child .....

No one can love a child as much as a birth mother or birth father does

17. Adoptive parents can love their child as fully and selflessly as biological parents can .....

Most adoptive parents are unfit

18. Some believe that adoptive parents are not as fit to raise a child as are the biological parents, or that no one can love a child as much as a birth parent, or that God is punishing childless couples or sending a message that they should not be parents, or that adoptive parents are abusive .....

A birthparent will forget about the child released for adoption

19. Birthmothers never forget their children They always hold a special place in their heart Some young women facing unplanned pregnancies have found it helpful to learn about adoption first hand through a birth parent who has been through the process .....

Birth mothers are all teenagers

20. Birth mothers international and domestic come in all ages and from all walks of life Some are teens, but the mythical unwed teen mother that many people think of when they imagine adoption is a hold over from the 1950s and 1960s when single and teen motherhood were less acceptable in certain areas of society than they are now These days, the reasons for placing children in adoptive families tend to be more diverse than mere age or marital .....

Adoptive parents are saintly for adopting

21. Adoptive parents are always hearing how great they are for having adopted People always mean well when they say this, but the fact is, most adoptive parents adopted because they wanted to be parents Not because they are special saints This also sometimes sounds to adoptive parents like their children are somehow less lovable, and therefore, loving them is a heroic act Adopted parents just love their kids like other parents love theirs It doe .....

Adoption is the opposite of abortion As long as we have one we don t need the other

22. Adoption is one option in a society with reproductive freedom Adoption requires motherhood of a woman both throughout a pregnancy and delivery and throughout the rest of her life even if she never sees her child again after birth For a woman in a crisis pregnancy who doesn t want to be a mother, abortion is an important option For a woman who doesn t personally feel comfortable with abortion, but neither feels ready or able to raise a chil .....

Only married people can adopt

23. Adoption is meant to combine people with children and make them a complete family To many people the term complete family does not mean marriage Married people often adopt, of course, but there are no legal restrictions on whether or not you have to be married to adopt a child Same sex couples still cannot legally marry in many states, which is a common concern in terms of adoption; however, if you are capable of raising a child, you can ado .....

Adopted children have more psychological problems than biological children

24. Adopted children do well in life A research study showed that 50% of adopted youth said they were as happy as their peers while 38% rated themselves as happier In another research study, adopted adolescents scored positively in self esteem and self identity In yet another study, adopted adolescents scored higher on characteristics of well being and lower on characteristics of high risk behavior when compared to their peers .....

Adopted children are more likely to be troubled than birth children

25. Research shows that adoptees are as well adjusted as their non adopted peers There is virtually no difference in psychological functioning between them Numerous studies have been done on adopted children and found that they saw themselves as strong as their peers in personal identity and self esteem Support from family and friends and availability of counseling services .....

Open adoption causes problems for children

26. Adoptees are not confused by contact with their birthparents In reality, adoptees benefit from the increased understanding that their birthparents gave them life but their forever families take care of and nurture them .....

You should wait to tell your child that he or she is adopted until he or she is old enough to understand

27. The child will grow up knowing that his family was created by adoption and understanding that his or her birth mother selflessly planned a wonderful future for her child The child will be grateful for the birth parents choice of adoption .....

A child doesn t really need a father

28. Children benefit from having positive, nurturing parents who can provide both positive male and female influences Two parent families where fathers take their responsibilities seriously and parents support each other can be vital to a healthy childhood and strong family .....

As soon as you adopt you ll get pregnant

29. Adoption does not guarantee or ensure pregnancy, and it should not be used as a means to try and get pregnant Pregnancy is a biological process, and a couple can not determine if and when they will become pregnant .....

Is adoption only for people without children

30. No Some families will have older children, at least two years older than the age of the child they wish to adopt Others have no children Many of our adopters have birth children, adopted children and step children already Some are already permanently caring for a child not related to them .....

There are many unwanted babies available for domestic adoption

31. Birthmothers love their children and want what is best for them A birthmother contacts an adoption agency when she is unable to parent her child Adoption agencies recognize how difficult a decision this is and uses a unique hands on case management approach for both birth parents and adoptive parents .....

Birthparents who care about their child would never consider adoption

32. if you consider adoption for your child, you are a cold, uncaring, selfish person Maybe you re afraid others will think you don t love your child In fact, women who make adoption plans for their children are among the most courageous, because they put their child s needs first Choosing to place your child with a family that can provide a stable, loving, home is an act of love and sacrifice, not an act of abandonment .....

A birthparent will never know anything about her child

33. As the birthparents, you can help to develop an adoption plan that has the degree of openness you want The adoption process today seeks to share information on a level that will benefit all birthparents, adoptive parents and most importantly, the child .....

You can t adopt unless you re rich and have a big house

34. If you can support the child with food, water, a bed, a roof, a healthy environment, safety, and an education, then you can adopt There are adoption requirements that you have to meet in order to raise a child, but boatloads of money is not one of them The child only needs a bed by law; however, if you have multiple children, you need to meet other legal obligations such as living requirements of children over the age of 6 Contact us if you re .....

All adopted children will never see their birth parents again

35. If the family uses open adoption, a child could reconnect with their birth parents in the future In many cases, the child doesn t even desire to reconnect with their birth parents, so this is myth is only partially true Learn more about the differences between open adoption and closed adoption here .....

The Adoption Process Takes Many Years

36. The timeframe is unpredictable because it depends on when you are chosen by a prospective birth mother Depending on the quality of the profile you create and how open you are to different situations, many domestic adoptions can be completed in only a few months .....

Your child will think adoption is the greatest thing to happen to him

37. But most likely he ll think of his adoption much differently than you will It s your dream to get a child, but it s his nightmare He s being taken from his familiar environment to a strange place among strange people perhaps never to see his former caregivers again For a child who has already been traumatized, adoption itself can be a trauma It depends on the age and situation of the child .....

Adoption will complete you

38. We were hoping to complete our family because we felt insufficient But this was too much pressure to put on him How could a broken boy complete us? Instead, adoptive parents need to know who they are so they can be who the child needs them to be whole, resolute, and overflowing We adopted our first child because of infertility .....

Birthmothers will always struggle with the emotional pain of placing a child for adoption

39. Our trained staff is here to help you process your emotions in a healthy way Many birthmothers tell us they find peace in knowing that their child is happy, healthy, and loved by the adoptive family they chose In addition, most birthmothers find that the experience actually gives them strength and confidence to face other challenges throughout their lives .....

Adoption means abandoning your child

40. Adoption is the complete opposite of abandonment It is a loving, mature, and responsible parenting decision Adoption means planning for the child s future and making sure his or her child s long term needs are met Adoption is by no means taking the easy way out It is a difficult decision where the birthmother places her child s needs above her own wants .....

The best way to integrate your new child is to return to normal life

41. We learned to shrink our world, which meant limiting the people we were around, our activities outside of the home, and even our boys exposure to extended family and close friends Everything changed This might upset others, but the preference needs to be given to your new child Form your new normal life around your immediate family and a consistent routine .....